From Monica Lewinsky to Stormy Daniels: A powerful reflection on how women like Stormy Daniels defy shame and dismantle sexist narratives. Their stories remind us to never underestimate the strength of a woman who refuses to be silenced.
Written by: Ava Sinclair
In 1995, 49-year-old President Bill Clinton began a two-year affair with a 22-year-old intern named Monica Lewinsky. The relationship would eventually lead to his impeachment, but on the legal road the scandal would take, Team Clinton painted Lewinsky as an obsessed, crazed liar.
Had it not been for a stained dress, Lewinsky would have been forever branded as a liar. But even if a semen stain verified her story, her reputation remained just as stained. Years later she is still vilified and even blamed for what occurred between her and a much older and enormously powerful man.
Fast forward to 2016 when presidential candidate Donald Trump pays $130,000 to porn star Stormy Daniels to buy her silence about a sexual tryst, the two shared just days after his third wife gave birth to their son.
Last month Trump was found guilty on 34 felony counts of falsifying business records relating to that payment, and in court, he faced off with Daniels who provided testimony that would lead to his conviction.
Despite political differences, there are similarities between how these women have been treated.
Like Lewinsky, Stormy Daniels was in her twenties in 2006 when she met Trump, who was 30 years her senior. Like Clinton, Trump had been long dogged by stories of infidelities and even assaults, all knocked back by Team Clinton who discredited the women with what they called the “nuts and sluts” defense. Likewise, Trump has cast his accusers as opportunists seeking to exploit or extort him.
But a lot has changed since 1995. When Stormy Daniels took the stand in Trump’s hush money trial, one thing became clear: the tactics so readily used to disparage women would not work on her.
I think it’s fair to say that Stormy Daniel kicks ass, and her testimony was a masterclass in how to dismantle the sexist, slut-shaming apparatus historically used to eviscerate and discredit women. Trump’s female lawyer Susan Necheles tried to undercut Daniels’ credibility by reminding the jury of what they already knew – the witness was both a producer and star in pornographic films.
“You have a lot of experience making up phony stories about sex,” Necheles said at one point, obviously forgetting that Daniels was a woman who would not be shamed about sex because she does not consider sex shameful. Stormy Daniels is a woman comfortable with sex, so much so that she flipped the tables on Necheles by reminding her that sex with Trump was very real.
That very real encounter was described to the jury, and although not graphic, there was enough detail to understand why Daniels says she regrets having sex with a creepy older man who told her she reminded him of his daughter.
Daniels coming forward to tell her story without a scintilla of the shame still demanded of women was both brave and refreshing. She’s been the subject of online vitriol and death threats since she started speaking out against Trump several years ago. But she’s scrappy and has become known for her quick-fire retorts that leave online trolls deflated.
Daniels makes no apologies for her sex life, her career, or her decision to speak out, making her the kind of woman we should all aspire to – one who gives zero fucks about the attempts to cage and control women through archaic double standards that paint sexually adventurous men as playboys and sexually adventurous women as whores.
Does Stormy like sex? Yes.
Does Stormy make money from sex? Yes.
If you come for Stormy with the intention of shaming her for either will you regret it? Yes.
Ironically, it was Stormy’s experience as a stripper and porn star that made her such a formidable witness. She’s no Pollyanna. She’s savvy about both human nature and business. She’s unafraid, even when she knows there’s a lot to fear.
One can’t help but wonder how Lewinsky would have fared if she’d had the support to call out the shamers when Bill Clinton proclaimed he did “not have sex with that woman.” If “that woman” had held a press conference backed by noted feminists to say, “ENOUGH!” would it have made a difference?
Instead, sexism was a powerful enough weapon to put a young intern on defense. A dirty dress had to do the talking because when it comes to sex, a woman’s word was not enough, and the man who’d broken a vow to be faithful to his wife was seen as more credible until evidence proved otherwise.
The fact that men like Trump are still trying to use slut-shaming as a defense is morally reprehensible. The good news is that as women become less ashamed of sex, moral humiliation tactics have less power. As society moves towards equality, men can no longer play the helpless victims of the seductive siren song of women.
When Stormy Daniels took the stand in that hush money case, she may not have been the defendant, but during the cross examination her character was on trial. She looked squarely in the face of her accusers and let them know that they had no power over her.
By doing that, she helped break the power that kind of thinking has over all of us.
Thank you, Stormy Daniels.
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